As you`ve noticed, these issues can put a strain on your marriage. Even when married, men tend to be loyal to their family of origin and especially to their mother. This can cause them to be defensive when they perceive your excitement as an attack on their mother or their family`s original values. The trick is to stand firm without appearing to accuse your in-laws of deliberately putting their grandchild at risk. Let them tell them as calmly as you can that you feel too uncomfortable doing things their way. You can say, “I know things were different when you raised children, but our doctor insists [whatever safety measure they don`t follow] and we have to be absolutely sure that everyone follows his instructions. They may still think it`s all overblown, but they`re more likely to understand that you`re just following the doctor`s instructions and not criticizing their ability to care for a child. If you don`t like your mother-in-law, two of the best things you can do is make sure you`re always kind and patient. Whatever happens, as I said, you should be friendly, as this can potentially lead to a better relationship with her in the future. And that`s where patience comes in. Good relationships take time and effort. Stay patient and understanding and you may end up developing a great relationship with your mother-in-law.

But these figures are not new, as early as 1954, a study showed that even then, only one in four women loved their mother-in-law. But I wish I had been nicer to her instead of being irritated. I wasn`t mean or anything, but the more she insisted, the more distant I became. I stopped sharing the little things my kids were doing to him, things like that. Now, ten years later, she and I are very close. I think I felt threatened by her. Being a new mom is already so stressful and then you have this crazy lady who seems to want to take care of everything. allows you to withdraw in Mama Bear mode. If you`ve decorated your home in a certain way, it can be really annoying when your mother-in-law comes and starts moving things around without asking. You may want to consider finding a way to allow your mother-in-law to spend time with your children without you feeling the pressure to spend time with her. If you feel comfortable with their ability to supervise and care for your children in your absence, use the time to run errands, go for a walk, or hang out with a friend. Complaints about daughters-in-law rage on the popular “Gransnet” discussion site.

From mothers-in-law who feel out of place to mothers-in-law who disapprove of the woman by whom they feel displaced. It`s best to talk to your partner about this first. If they agree that you should talk to their mother, do so calmly and confidently. I have 4 sons, I can tell you that one day I will be that grandmother. My eldest is only 13 years old, but you bet I`m already thinking and hopefully one day I`ll have granddaughters I can treat like this. Give grandma the chance to spoil this little girl as much as possible, she never had the chance with her own daughter. If your mother-in-law makes statements or comments of judgment, try not to take it personally. Your comments reflect your thoughts and feelings and although they are addressed to you, they have nothing to do with you.

Try to maintain a sense of humor, change the subject or simply ignore their comments. It may be tempting to engage in a sarcastic rebuttal, but this reaction can`t stop the behavior and could lead to more tension in the relationship. If she is hurtful or disrespectful, give yourself the means to be direct and let her know that she upset you instead of stifling resentment and frustration. Try to frame your argument with your mother-in-law not as a criticism of her, but simply as a relationship where you need support and help to cope differently. It`s often helpful to ask your husband to get more directly involved in sorting things out. If your mother-in-law knows how to play the sympathy card and does it when she wants to get what she wants, it`s toxic behavior that becomes incredibly frustrating. Relationships between in-laws can be difficult for everyone involved. As described in your situation, your mother-in-law has good intentions to want to help you and spend time with her grandchildren.

However, their mere presence means stress for you with their insensitive and critical comments. I`m curious why your mother-in-law keeps calling? Is she worried about something, are you ignoring her calls, or is it a personality trait? Since calls are intrusive and consistent, you need to understand what motivates them to call so often. Finding an annoying mother-in-law can be the result of controlling and overprotective behavior towards children. They seem to hold grudges, judge the actions of stepchildren, and give unsolicited advice about parenting. These mothers may have different beliefs that can lead to confrontations. Unfortunately, many mothers-in-law feel they have the right to make personal comments about their sons/daughters-in-law – whether it`s about their weight, clothes, or anything else. Personal comments from your mother-in-law can be really hurtful, and it`s not something you should deal with. Some in-laws are harder to manage than others, and some are completely impossible, but experts agree that most relationships can thrive when certain ground rules are in place. And if you`re having a harder time negotiating with your own parents, these tips can also apply to them: Do you have trouble adjusting to your mother-in-law? Do you want things to work out between the two of you and not tear your head off? Learn how to deal with a difficult mother-in-law, with some helpful tips given below, and keep your peace and sanity under control. It was also exaggerated. She bought everything so the baby could stay in her house, and I was mean because I said no.

For some reason, she thought it would be a good idea to throw a party for her friends to meet our baby with my newborn daughter two days after she left the hospital. I was demonized for not walking (seriously, I couldn`t walk standing up and I was bleeding like a stuck pig). She had planned to take my daughter camping (without me) when she was three months old. She told me to stop breastfeeding because I was assaulting her baby. It was really weird. You may never feel as comfortable with your partner`s family as you do with your own, but it`s crucial to resolve such disputes: these people will be in your life for a long time. Of course, it is impossible to avoid all clashes. But there are ways to calm even the most burning problems: my love goes to my MIL (she`s right there) and loves spending time with her aunt. Yes, they buy frilly stuff for my daughter, but my child also asked about dinosaurs for his birthday this year, so I think we keep a healthy balance. Plus, I let them buy most of their clothes, which saves us money and does something they love. I hate clothes and shopping in general, so it`s a win-win situation. I appreciate their generosity and have learned to let go of the little things that bother me, and as a result, my child becomes an incredibly diverse little person with many people who love and support him.

Again, win/win! In a study by the University of Cambridge, two-thirds of daughters-in-law expressed the belief that their partner`s mother was guilty of “excessively jealous maternal love”. And so on: “My DH ALWAYS sides with her, no matter how wrong she is and it drives me crazy! When it comes to them, he`s NEVER been in a team with us and that`s me endlessly. AND because she knows, she`s using it to her advantage in ways you wouldn`t believe. She doesn`t have to mother you or interfere in your personal affairs, whether it involves your partner or not. The problem is particularly acute between mothers and their mothers-in-law. Like any grandparent, a mother-in-law is interested in having a relationship with her son`s child, but she may not have the pre-existing relationship with her daughter-in-law to achieve this smoothly, and her interest may seem like interference. Similarly, a new mother has the right to independence and to make her own decisions about how to raise her children with her partner. Daughters-in-law find it difficult not to love their mother-in-law when the mother-in-law interferes in the relationship between her child and daughter-in-law. Studies have shown that mothers worry about their relationship with their children once their child marries.

Mothers feel unsure of their place in the relationship when their children become dependent on their partner. This insecurity can cause a mother-in-law to try to interfere too much in the relationship. This uncertainty also leads to mothers and daughters not getting along. While men usually hope that their wives and mothers get along, they tend to withdraw and leave it to them to shape their relationship. As a wife, this can often make you feel a little abandoned and feel like you have to fend for yourself. To get your husband`s support, it`s important to appreciate his sense of loyalty to his mother and not put him in a position where he feels he has to make a choice. I agree with you! People can only be with babies for a very short period of their lives and they will probably have to wait for this since their child has grown up. If they negatively affect your child, such as: Impose culture on the princess and it bothers you because you think it will affect your daughter`s perception of herself, calmly explain your reasons to her and ask her to call the princess back.